Run 1063 Report

Lakeside Hash House Harriers The drinking club with a running problem

LAKESIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS COMMITTEE 2004-2005

Grand Master The Boomerang Religious Advisor SBD Hash Cash Underfelt Grog Master Janus Soc Sec Miss Piggy On Sec Rolf Harris Hash Haberdash Shagadelic Hare Raiser Kokup Hash Flash Bovine Breeder Web Master Klingon

Subs of $50 are now due, payable to HashCash Underfelt!

Run 1063, 27 October 2004 Hare: Rigby Venue:  Beckett Park, Balwyn. Lookout Tower off Banool St  

(Eleanor) Rigby poured out the flour on the ground which the rain washed away.  I should have known better than to attend Run 1063. Sleeting rain and gales greeted the forlorn pack. But there were still plenty of us out in the pouring rain; very strange. Eventually we spied the On in the dark gloom of … Park, behind the shelter in the middle of a roundabout, when Rigby called out  “can’t you see me in my field of grass?”  Believe it or not, some even arrived by bicycle. I was thankful I was able to drive my car.   It was good to run from a new venue. Mostly when I turn up to Hash, I’m thinking,  there are venues I’ll remember all my life; though some have changed, and let me tell you; some forever not for better. Some have gone and some remain. All these places have their moments.  In my life I’ve run them all. The last wan streaks of sunset were going down and the tinkling of suburban lights were taking over on the horizon as the GM called the pack to order.  For those of you who didn’t brave the elements,  … Park is the highest point in inner suburban Melbourne, so Gerbils told me, but of all places to be on such a night! And I felt like the fool on the hill who sees the sun going down.

Meanwhile Astro was having tram-problems again, which always seem to crop up when he has to come through to the eastern suburbs. Privately, I reckon the trouble is  the five ways at Kew Junction. Be that as it may, the trouble this time was that Astro gets on, already late for Hash, and pipes up with “I’m travelling on the one after 9:09 (p.m). I’ve just I got my bag, run to the station.” However, he’s shocked when the driver answers – “you’ve got the wrong location.” So, Astro says, “I got my bag, run right home. Checked the Melway ref, then I find I’ve got the number wrong!”

Well, you’ll understand that if you start a run from the top of a hill; the trail’s just gonna remain hilly the whole night long. I was struggling at the back of the pack petty well right from the off. And what with being late, Astro was struggling even worse off right behind me.  Astro was a man who thought he was a runner; but he knew he’d come in last.  It wasn’t easy going, but I resolved to myself, just turn off your mind, relax and float downstream; breathe evenly, and lay down all thoughts; surrender to the void. The respite from the rain didn’t last long before there was a crash of thunder, and Cooch yelled out, “Look out, ‘cause here she comes!” We all rushed in different directions, helter skelter. The Shah warned, She’s coming down fast!” and I said, “Yes, she is.” The wild and windy night that the rain washed away wasn’t doing my running form any favours, and pretty soon I had that unnerving, disorientated feeling. Hullo, I thought, I’ve seen that road before. It always leads me here. Well, during a run, many times I’ve been alone, and many times I’ve cried, “Are you??!!” Bugger those non-calling bastards, I thought. Why leave me standing here? Let me know the way! There was nothing for it but to check out all the possibilities myself, at the risk of dropping further behind in the rain. But still they lead me back, to the long, winding road.  

I’m worried; where is Lotsa Fun, who was just in front of me a few seconds ago. I can even hear her footfall.  I’m thinking, I listen for your footsteps, coming up the drive; listen for your footsteps but they don’t arrive. I wonder where you are tonight, and why I’m by myself? I don’t see you!  Thankfully just then, E & B, who’d also joined in late, hove into view and saved the day. I said, “You left me standing here a long, long time ago. Don’t leave me waiting here.” E & B assured me that we can work it out, but I warned that on a strange trail, think of what you’re saying. You can get it wrong and still you think that it’s alright. Then we ran into with Silent-but-Deadly, who was walking along at the back of the pack with Gerbils. So I said to him, that’s pretty unusual for you isn’t it, SBD? You’re usually way out in front. People will think you’re piking. He shrugged and said, what if everybody seems to think I’m lazy. I don’t mind, I think they’re crazy Running everywhere at such a speed. Till they find there’s no need; there’s no need.  Look at all the on-backs!

I had actually cut a bit off the trail while the others crossed further down at the pedestrian crossing.  All except Nickel-B; he didn’t notice that the lights had changed. We don’t do that at Lakeside anymore. A crowd of people stood and stared.

Finally, after an eternity, we came onto a wide oval, and spied the pack clustered round the drinkstop. Even from that distance I could see that the drinks were flowing out like endless rain into a paper cup, with GG and Tangles that call me on and on across the broad reserve.  Rigby and Shagadelic had laced the tomato juice with a bit of vodka and you had to be careful, otherwise you might knock one too many back with your head in the clouds… and you’re gone. I thought it would be a short trot home from the drinkstop, but boy was I wrong there. We were still miles from … Park. The pack started fanning out in all directions. Dangerous stuff when you’re weary and puffing. Somebody calls you on; you answer quite slowly, its Miss Piggy who’s drunk a few, with kaleidoscope eyes. Falling behind, the rain sets in again. Up go the makeshift cellophane umbrellas of yellow and green, towering over your head; look for the girl with the headlights in her eyes, and she’s gone.18 Damnit! And my friends have lost their way. We’ll be over soon they said. Now they’ve lost themselves instead! How long can this run go on? Please don’t be long, I’m thinking, please don’t you be very long!

But salvation is at hand in the form of Astro who knows the local scene well. I fall in with him and another former local, Gerbils, on the walkers’ trail, her holding the makeshift cellophane umbrella of yellow and green.  She looks at my sodden form and says to Astro; at least the two of us are wearing raincoats. I say dejectedly, yeah, you and me chasing trail, getting nowhere, on our way back home. But Astro knows the lay of the land and reassures me with “We’re on our way home; we’re going home.”

Anyhow, a massive sizzling barbie of steak and sausages in the rain cooked up by Kok-Up and Punch awaited us; which we ate by the light of the fierce hurricane lamp. It was like an English summer, so strong, you could almost get a tan by standing in the ‘English’ rain. We shivered through a few short charges, the highlight of which was Snowbitch drinking for showing a strange young man her map on a street corner – by torchlight. Kok-up got his 50th run trophy and Astro his 200th run hip-flask.

Finally, The Boomerang said that now its time to say goodnight, so all of you bugger off; goodnight, sleep tight! Frozen I manage to drove home. Mummies’ Girl greeted me at the door and asked me if I wanted a cup of hot cocoa, but I told her I didn’t and crawled off to sleep in the bath.

On on Mummies’ Boy

This week, (Eleanor) Rigby has inspired me to write the Trash by using or alluding to Beatles’ song lyrics. There’s an obvious one to start off, and 23 songs in all. Can you spot them all? First correct reply to me on (…. see email list) wins an alcoholic prize! Prizes and results announced at next week’s run! M.B.

Upcumming events Next Full Moon run is Sunday 21 Nov 04, Anakie Gorge, 4pm, Hares: NickleB & Lotsa Fun Balls-up 2004 Saturday, 30 Oct 2004 7pm Geelong Melbourne Bike Hash in the King Valley winery area is November 6/7 – see Whippet for a flyer. NashHash Easter 2005 .  

UPCOMING RUNS & EVENTS  

3 Nov 1064 Clitus & Gumboot A.E. Shepherd Oval, Footscray Park 2S J4 Melbourne Cup Hat Run 10 Nov 1065 IBM & Swallower IBM’s Southern Retreat, 7 Nelson St, Sandringham  76 H8 17 Nov 1066 SBD Allnutt Park, Wheatley Road, Bentleigh 68 C11 1066 and all that.   

Lakeside Hash House Harriers Home      

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *